Well I have made it 4 weeks into motherhood. Phew... what a exhausting, exciting, hard, fun, joyous, and adventurous time it has been. Aubrey is 4 weeks old today and has already had so many adventures in her life. She is a lucky little girl. These adventures have been hard on mom and dad though. Aubrey was born 4 weeks ago and since then has spent time in the hospital, taken a road trip to Salt Lake City, flew in an airplane to California, gotten blessed, had family from all over the country come and see her, and gone on various shopping trips. What a busy girl.
Just a week and a few days after being born, we had to travel to Southern California for Chris's internship that started the day before Aubrey was born. Luckily the boss was Aubrey's Grandpa and was leaniant with the timing of our arrival. For my birthday my mother gave Chris and I plane tickets to fly our family instead of enduring the 15 hour drive with a 1 week old. (Which probably would have been a 25-30 hour drive with all the feeding and changing stops). She was an angel and drove our car home by herself. I am so blessed to have such an amazing mother. The flight went very well. Aubrey slept all the way through security and woke up on our drive home from the airport. She was an perfect. I was a nervous wreck, taking her on the plane. I almost had an anxiety attack. I was glad we made it safe and I was blessed that the flight was during nap time. We got settled in and the next day Chris started working and I started my life as a stay at home mom.
Being a mom has got to be the hardest thing I have ever done. There has been so many life changes in the past few weeks. And add recovering from a c-section on top of it all. There has been some challenges that I have been struggling with that have made the transition difficult. First of all breastfeeding is really hard!! Aubrey and I have been having some major issues. I have seen lactation consultants and read many articles and blogs to try and get some help. Aubrey destroyed my nipples and it had become so painful all I could do was cry as I was feeding her. I would latch her and re-latch her over and over again until be were both so frustrated that she would not want to eat and I didn't want to frustrate her so I dealt with the pain. There were nights I was so sore and tired that I just had Chris give her a bottle with formula. I almost gave up until my doctor said at her 2 week appointment that she was not back up to her birth weight and I needed to make sure I was feeding her enough. He said to use a nipple shield so that I could still breastfeed her. What a life saver. I could finally feed her with out being in pain. Aubrey is an aggressive breast feeder and I have come to that fact that I will just have to use the shield, and that is ok. She is starting to grow a lot and gain some weight, so it is making me feel good.
Another big struggle that I have been dealing with it hormone changes. Gosh those things are awful!! I cry for no reason and when I am tired it is like 3 times worse!! Which I am tired a lot. I feel bad for Chris, having to deal with all of this. I never really had mood swings, like ever, so this has been hard for me to deal with. It is slowly getting better, now that I am healing and getting some better sleep. My mother and husband have been huge supporters of me and this adventure of motherhood that I am going through. It is all worth it though. Each time Aubrey looks at me with her beautiful eyes, my heart melts. I love her with all that I have. She is my sunshine. I am so grateful for the challenge and trial that these past 4 weeks have been, and I am excited to see what life will bring in the future.
Okay, this is probably way more than you bargained for when you asked for advice on breastfeeding, but I happen to have strong feelings on the subject.
ReplyDeleteIt is way overrated.
I breastfed Ellie for 11 months (exclusively for 6, then part breastfeeding/part formula for 5). The whole time, I struggled with D-MER, low milk supply, being physically uncomfortable during feedings, being stressed when going out about when/where I was going to feed her, feeling isolated during social gatherings when I had to take her to some other room to feed her (she hated nursing under a cover, I wasn't comfortable nursing without one) for an hour (she ate really, really slow - partly due to having to use a nipple shield for the first three months), and more.
I did it because I'd heard sooo many times that "breast is best" and "breastmilk is liquid gold" and that breastfeeding would make your baby smarter and healthier.
And guess what? It's not, and it doesn't.
Since then, new studies have come out that have shown that, in the US, the benefits of breastmilk vs formula are waaay overstated. In poor countries, where the water supply can be unclean, breastmilk is actually beneficial because it protects the baby from unclean water. But in the US, where we have clean water, formula delivers all of the nutrition breastmilk does, except for the live antibodies. This study (http://www.skepticalob.com/2014/02/hold-the-guil-new-study-finds-benefits-of-breastfeeding-dramatically-overstated.html), which was published this February, found that there was no difference AT ALL in BMI, obesity, asthma, hyperactivity, parental attachment, behavioral compliance, math skills, reading, vocabulary, or intelligence between siblings fed breastmilk vs siblings fed formula. No difference! The reason that many "breast is best" studies show a difference in formula vs. breastfed children is that they don't properly account ethnic, cultural, or socioeconomic factors.
Anyway, my point is - if you enjoy breastfeeding, do it. Some people get warm fuzzy hormones when they breastfeed, and those make it worth it for them. But if you don't enjoy it - for any reason at all - formula is a great alternative, and it is JUST as healthy for your baby and she will be just as healthy and smart if she drinks it.
Sorry - this whole long-winded thing is probably not what you were looking for at all. But I just think our culture pushes the "breast is best" thing way too much, and I wish someone would have told me all this when I had my first baby.
With Zelda, I breastfed her the first two months and it was just as hard as the first time. At two months, we switched completely over to formula. And I LOVE it. It has been such a better experience for me when breastfeeding. I haven't been stressed about low supply. I haven't been stressed about going out of the house. I haven't had D-MER. It has just been the best. I recently decided that when I have my next baby, they're going straight to formula. Because I like it that much, and I just don't enjoy breastfeeding. And, in the US, with our clean water supply, there is really no reason to breastfeed unless you enjoy it.
Again - sorry - I'll stop now. You are awesome, Jackie. I hope you're able to get some more sleep (there's just never enough, haha!) and that everything works out. :)
Lol, I justed posted my comment, and it is ridiculously long. I'm sorry. Maybe I'll copy it and put it as a post on my own blog; I obviously have a lot to say about it. Sorry again!
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